Figments of Human Intellect

I think the human breed is often quite dumb..proof??

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --
'Do not turn upside down.'
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)


On Sainsbury's peanuts --
'Warning: contains nuts.'
(talk about a news flash)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine --
'Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking
this medication.'
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding --
'Product will be hot after heating.
(...and you thought????...)

On a Sears hairdryer --
Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

On a bag of Fritos --
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Dial soap --
'Directions: Use like regular soap.'
(and that would be???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners --
'Serving suggestion: Defrost.'
(but, it's just a suggestion.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron --
'Do not iron clothes on body.'
(but wouldn't this save me time?)

On Nytol Sleep Aid --
'Warning: May cause drowsiness.'
(..I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights --
'For indoor or outdoor use only.'
(as opposed to what?)